1. paragraph captions at the top of each HCP and AP Draft Page make detailed claims about the draft involved, and brief a summary overviews.
2. There is a decent amount of reflection about the experiences the author describes. However, I would like to see a more in-depth discussion about how these experiences will benefit you in the future as a student at university.
3. Consider adding captions even though you already refer to the pictures in your body paragraphs.
4. Consider zooming the pictures in to only show the most important portions of your work that you want to highlight.
5. highlighting areas that still require improvement though since there does not seem to be too much of a discussion about this aspect in your current draft.
Peer reviews about my portfolio:
Your Reflective Introduction is well thought-out because you provided concrete claims along with evidence, through the use of images and specific moments in your writing to show your progress as a writer. For example, you mentioned about drafts and annotations during the composition process of your ePortfolio and discussed how those pre-writing assignments were important in developing your argument. However, you did not cover one area of the ePortfolio criteria which was about the rhetoric, argumentation, and multi-modal communication. I think you should also discuss how multi-modality has impacted your writing within this course.
Feedback from professor: very important!!!!!! please do everything that mentioned by professor!!!!!!!
ARGUMENT: In general, while you make a few good observations about skills you have learned in 39C, your reflexive introduction lacks a clear focus and ultimately suffers from relying too heavily on a timeline model to construct your composition. While your ePort does contain subsections corresponding to the 4 major component areas of the prompt, throughout your analysis is missing any central motivating argument. Instead, you jump from stage to stage of the assignment, making vague reference to key skills you may have acquired along the way. However, in doing so, you only speak generally to what you’ve learned about writing, and more to how you completed each process/step. Moreover, in doing so, you don’t reference any concrete artifacts. One way to go about organizing your observations beyond the four major areas of the prompt is to treat this composition like other compositions we’ve created this quarter – with an introduction and a framing argument. You start to do this in the body of your RI when you state: “Throughout all the writing for the CP and AP, I have learned that diligence, self-reflection, and peer reflection are important steps toward writing a masterpiece…” You make this statement early while analyzing/describing your expefrience is rich in its potential for a thesis statement. What you are suggesting is that instead, you resorted to certain skills and tools in the research and composition process. These COULD be a great thesis statement/frame for your analysis – that writing, here, took open-minded research, planning, outlining, brain-storming, etc. rather than the type of writing you were used to. Otherwise, the intro to your RI reads more like a series of uncoordinated observations than a frame.
ARCHITECTURE & MM: I can see in your reflexive introduction that you are already thinking about HOW to present your composition, making use of sub-section titles and multi-modality to enhance your composition. In the section you’ve completed, you employ multimodal artifacts and refer to them within your composition both as evidence and a source of analysis. This is fabulous – you are SHOWING what you learned by DOING IT. However, your use of a comparative image contrast gets a little repititious, and the details of the images are difficult to read. Do you need to have an image of the entire assignment, or can you screen-grab a particular section or paragraph of the assignment that illustrates your claim? If you can model this elsewhere, this will be a successful ePort. Also, regarding the tabs of your page in general, your RI should come before all your assignments (self-assessment, cp, ap, etc.) Finally, make sure that your captions on the pages where you’ve uploaded process work for your assignments (AP Drafts, CP drafts, etc.) contain some descriptive and analytical content. As these pages currently stand, you do not have any comments on the artifacts or give them some context in any significant way. Otherwise, good job with your build-out.